How to NOT be a Bridezilla!
Okay - so we're going to get a tiny bit REAL with this blog! Bridezilla's are EVERYWHERE!
Hands up if you've seen the news article doing the rounds this week about the CRAZY bride who wanted her wedding guests to come up with a $1700 contribution towards her dream wedding? Let's be honest - that was a PRETTY extreme example of "Bridezilla" behaviour - BUT the truth is - she's probably not the only person who's gone a little bit loopy in the pursuit of "happily-ever-after".
If you're reading our blog you're either planning a wedding, know someone who is or are in the Industry (or are just REALLY into weddings) - either way - chances are you have come across a Bridezilla at some point in your life, or (dare I say it) you might be turning into one as I write this!
Firstly - you are NOT alone! Planning a wedding can be a SERIOUSLY stressful experience - there are a million of ideas floating around in your head (but not a million dollars in your bank account,right?), everyone has their own ideas about what you should wear, where you should get married, what you should eat, what colours the bridesmaids should wear and so on......and you have to balance the needs and wants of you, your family, your friends....and chances are you're doing all that with a significant other that's SO NOT into details? (Maybe just hire a planner now and let them take care of the details.....)
So - what can you do to make sure you DON'T become a Bridezilla - turning your friends, family and fiance against you and making the whole thing a big old disaster?
Here's our TOP TIPS on how to NOT be a BRIDEZILLA!
(Please note - we make references to some typical "bridezilla-esque" behaviours - if you've exhibited any of these - please don't be offended - but perhaps....do read on.....)
- Firstly - at ANY stage of the process - ASK FOR HELP! You have a partner in life who should also be your "partner in planning" - get them to sit down with you and work through problems and make decisions together. Reach out to your family and friends and don't forget - that's what you Bridal Party is for! They're not just there to wear pretty dresses/suits and fluff your train on the day - get them involved and have some fun! BUT remember - don't take advantage or make unreasonable requests or have unrealistic expectations - ie. don't demand your Bridesmaids have their tattoos lasered off or ask your best man to drop 20kgs! If you respect them - they'll bend over backwards to help make your day THE BEST!
- TRUST YOUR VENDORS - I can't emphasize this enough! When you give a vendor an instruction verbally - of course - feel free to follow up with an email of confirmation and then let them do their job! You don't need to keep tabs on everyone 24/7, you don't need to send then 30 emails a week and you certainly DON'T need to call them at nine o'clock at night to tell them you want to change the colour of your roses! TRUST that they know what they're doing and will do their very best for you. OF COURSE - make sure you have all your bases covered - and definitely don't part with ANY money until you have everything in writing - but seek out professional vendors who have a good reputation and trust that they've got you covered!
- BE REAL - and when I say this I mean don't expect diamonds and platinum on a shoestring budget. Don't expect more than you are willing or able to pay for. I honestly don't say this to be cruel - I say this so you don't end up disappointed and frustrated. One of biggest sources of Bridezilla-related-behaviour is STRESS....and more often than not - this stress can be directly attributed to budgetery concerns! Prepare your budget and know what you can spend before you embark on any wedding planning and then be realistic about what you can and can't afford.
- SWITCH OFF from Wedding Planning on the regular. It's very easy to get COMPLETLEY caught up in all-things-wedding and lose track of the rest of your life. Don't forget to show your love to the people in your life and celebrate the special moments in their life too. On your Wedding Day it will be ALL about you and your significant other - but in the run up - be respectful of what's going on around you and be there for the people who matter! When Wedding Planning gets too much - put down your phone and the Bridal Magazines and get outside and walk off the stress!
- TAKE CARE OF YOUSELF - stress can REALLY take it's toll on you emotionally and physcially. A tired, hungry bride-to-be can very easily turn into a BRIDEZILLA! Make sure that you're getting enough sleep, eating properly, drinking enough water and getting regular exercise. Not only will you FEEL much better in general - but just imagine how AWESOME you're going to look in your frock!!!
- PLAN AHEAD - take your time making your plans and give yourself enough time to do everything. The shorter the timeframe - the more stressful things will become - it's that simple! A last minute Bride has HUGE potential to turn into a BRIDEZILLA. Now - I'm not saying start planning your wedding five years in advance - but if you can - give yourself a good 12-18 months to get everything just "right".
- FOCUS ON THE BIGGER PICTURE - a Wedding is JUST ONE DAY! Think about the rest of your life together! When wedding planning is getting you down - just remember it's one day in the tens of thousands you'll have together - all the little things that could and will go wrong will just give you something memorable to look back on!
- Finally and MOST importantly TRUST YOURSELF! You picked your dress for a reason, you chose your venue for a reason, your selected a photographer for a reason. Take the time to make informed decisions and then TRUST THEM. Don't doubt yourself, don't secondguess your decisions and don't freak out about changing your mind in the future. Have faith in yourself, your partner and your future together!
So that's that.......if you've read this and you'd found yourself identifying with any of the above.....put your phone/tablet/laptop down - get outside and enjoy the (hopefully) sunshine! If you're feeling like you MIGHT be turning into a Bridezilla - now's your chance to turn it around and be a Bride-chilla!
In most cases - you only get to do this ONCE in your life - so relax, put the stress and angst aside and ENJOY being a Bride!
Happy Wedding Planning
Mrs TW x